I'm...............

I'm feel i losing something. Something very important.

Something that i need to help me always smile from deep of my heart.

For past week, i'm felt frustrated,tension and always felt upset.

I also lost count of my tears for unreasonable reasons.

I kept to myself because i think no one want to hear me.

I full with emotion. My heart like broken mirror

that fall to floor and

people start to step on it. It really hurt. I wish i know why?....

Night past, i cannot sleep well. Bad dream always came to me. I afraid.

I know i'm losing something. But why i cant figure out what that something.

I wish somebody help me but i know its hopeless. I don't have anyone.

i only have myself. i'm alone.

before i'm sleep one day, i push my mind to search for the answer. i really need it.

My mind gone flashback to the last day that i really happy. the last day that i feel very calm.

the day that my smile always with me. I force myself to see the reason why i

can smile like that.

And i realize why i lose it...

i'm really not a good servant. I pray five time a days and everyday, but do not put my heart in it. I'm reading Al-Quran and its meaning but i just read its. When i close the cover, i already forget what i'm reading. i am rather spend my time for other activities that not benefit to me.

Yes, I;m forget the most important thing in my life. I forget that i'm a servant to You, YA ALLAH. When i desperate, i forget that i have Allah to listen to me. When i need help i forget that Allah always there to help me. i forget that i have a duty to Allah as his servant. I forgot.....

That why..... i losing myself, my faith, my calm, my happiness and my life.

Ya Allah, I begging for your forgiveness. I am sinful.

Ya Allah, you always with me. But I always forget about You, Ya Allah.......

Ya ALLAH, I MISS YOU!!!!!